Homelessness, Harvard and Big Tech
Examining Society’s Fixation with Resilience—and its Cost

ABOUT ACCEPTANCE
“Nietfeld’s gifts for capturing the fury of living at the mercy of bad circumstances, for critiquing the hero’s journey even while she tells it, make Acceptance a remarkable memoir.” —The New York Times Book Review
A luminous, generation-defining memoir of foster care and homelessness, Harvard and Big Tech, examining society’s fixation with resilience—and its cost.
As a homeless teenager writing college essays in her rusty Toyota Corolla, Emi Nietfeld was convinced that the Ivy League was the only escape from her dysfunctional childhood. But upward mobility required crafting the perfect resilience narrative. She had to prove that she was an “overcomer,” made stronger by all that she had endured.
The truth was more complicated. Emi’s mom was a charming hoarder who had her put on antipsychotics but believed in her daughter’s brilliance—unlike the Minnesotan foster family who banned her “pornographic” art history flash cards (of Michelangelo’s David). Emi’s other parent vanished shortly after coming out as trans, a situation few understood in the mid-2000s. Her own past was filled with secrets: mental health struggles, Adderall addiction, and the unbecoming desperation of a teenager fending for herself. And though Emi would go on to graduate from Harvard and become a software engineer at Google, she found that success didn’t necessarily mean safety.
Both a chronicle of the American Dream and an indictment of it, this searing debut exposes the price of trading a troubled past for the promise of a bright future. Told with a ribbon of dark humor, Acceptance challenges our ideas of what it means to overcome—and find contentment on your own terms.
Praise
Named a best book of 2022 by NPR and Amazon.
“Nietfeld’s gifts for capturing the fury of living at the mercy of bad circumstances, for critiquing the hero’s journey even while she tells it, make “Acceptance” a remarkable memoir.”
“A raw, insightful memoir—from childhood neglect to Harvard and Big Tech—tenderly baring the underbelly of what we call ‘success.’”
—People Magazine
“In this gripping, inspiring, and darkly humorous memoir, Emi Nietfeld recounts a life that took her from homelessness and foster care to Harvard and Google, and still left her unsatisfied with the American dream.”
—Philadelphia Inquirer, “Best New Books of the Month”
“Heart-pounding. . . . Nietfeld’s raw resilience and candor will keep readers enthralled until the very last page. This hits hard.”
—Publishers Weekly
“ACCEPTANCE is gripping, fascinating, funny and thought-provoking. . . . Nietfeld’s book and her life are extraordinary accomplishments, and she’s wonderful company.”
—Minneapolis StarTribune
Named a best book of 2022 by Amazon and NPR.
Book Clubs and Classroom Visits
“If Educated was a book that shook you, you need to pick up Acceptance by Emi Nietfeld... It’s an ideal book club read.”
Emi is available to Zoom into your book club meeting or classroom. If you ask nicely, she might give you the recipe for her mom’s cheesecake brownies.

Read An Excerpt

Reviews and Press
NEW YORK TIMES BOOK REVIEW
The Problem With Survivor Memoirs
NPR
Emi Nietfeld is done reaching for redemption in ‘Acceptance’
PEOPLE MAGAZINE
New in Nonfiction, August 15
BUZZFEED
2022 Is The Year Of The Bisexual Book
AMAZON.COM
Amazon Best Books Of 2022
Amazon Best Biography & Memoir
IOWA PUBLIC RADIO
Talk of Iowa's 2022 Holiday Book Guide for Adults
The Boston Globe
Emi Nietfeld Went From Homelessness to Harvard, But Not Without Scars
AUTOSTRADDLE
Let’s Hear It For The Disaster Bisexuals
49 Queer And Feminist Books Coming Out In 2022
PHILADELPHIA INQUIRER
The Best New Books to Read in August
SOUTHERN REVIEW OF BOOKS
The Myth of Resilience Recast: Emi Nietfeld’s “Acceptance”
CLEVELAND REVIEW OF BOOKS
“I could escape into my ambition”: On Emi Nietfeld’s “Acceptance”
STAR TRIBUNE
Review: ‘Acceptance,’ by Emi Nietfeld
APPLE BOOKS
Apple’s Best Books Of August
Apple’s Must-Listen Audiobooks
CARLY RIORDAN
DEBUTIFUL
August debut books you won’t want to miss
BOOK MARKS
The Best Reviewed Books of the Week (August 5, 2022)
DAILY HIVE
HERE AFTER WITH MEGAN DEVINE
LinkedIn’s THE ANXIOUS ACHIEVER
Using Achievement - And Exercise - To Cope
PBS’s Attribution
BIG MOOD, LITTLE MOOD
Post-Surgical Shame and Acceptance
LA REVIEW OF BOOKS
FICTION/NON/FICTION
The New Homeless: Emi Nietfeld on the Growing Number of Unhoused Americans
Vermont Conversation bY VT Digger
We Should Talk About That
An Indictment of the American Dream
The Harvard Gazette
How ‘cult of grit’ masks myths about U.S. society
OC REGISTER
Emi Nietfeld, who went public about harassment at Google, tells her story in ‘Acceptance’
Minneapolis-St. Paul Magazine
In Conversation with Emi Nietfeld
The Harvard Crimson
Six Crimson Editors Revisit The Essays That Got Them Into Harvard
WRITER’S VOICE with with Francesca Rheannon
An In-Depth Discussion About Acceptance
BOOKS AND WOMEN
The Three with Debut Emi Nietfeld
BLIND DATE WITH A BOOK
Bonus Episode: Emi Nietfeld, author of Acceptance
CURIOSITY HOUR
THE EXPERIMENT
DOWNTOWN WRITERS JAM
HOW WRITERS REVISE
Emi Nietfeld and Writing Real Life
LEADERSHIP VOYAGE
Leading Yourself with Emi Nietfeld
Chicago Review of Books
Bonus Babies
“So Many Things I Could Not Have Known”
BEFORE YOU KILL YOURSELF
THE STORY EXCHANGE
‘Acceptance’ Offers a New Take on Resilience
The Village Sun